I can't make up my mind ytd.

I'm so confuse . But after that.
I know what to do.
You're really so heartless treating me that way.
I'm dead . That what i can say.
But still thank to you once again. What you gave me is far enough.
Thanks.The photo you once told me you love the most.
Takecare.

I expected you will update i knew it.
I not giving up on myself. But i just felt it far too tired.
I know you have gone thru. But what i gone thru not less either.
I'm seriously tired of it that why i make the choice.
I just hope you guys will take care of yourself.
Mayb one day down the road i will be back .?
Who knows no one other than god.? Hahs.!
All the thing we facing is just something sickening and hurtful in the same time.
You will never know what will happen next.
As i say it so hard to continue if i'm the only one
FIGHTING it thru .


TREASURE WHAT YOU HAVE NOW.
B4 IT TOO LATE.

一切都是回忆

Is just a memories i can only keep it .
Nothing else i can do. The sweat and tear i drop i think is enough.
I believe even w/o me you guys will be happy. No different.
Still hope you guys will buck up in everything .
Work hard , Strive hard.

鹤权

Thank for the perfect memories you guys gave to me.
I will treasure it deep in my heart.
Peace. Loves. Cares.

Why must you always cover yourself .? When you already do something hurtful.?
Dont you think is lil too late. Even a outsider can pity on me.
Yet all you know is you and your nasty comment. WTF.??
Enough lah. In the past , i might need to tahan all the thing you do.
But not now ok.?? Avoid misunderstanding.? Hahs. You yourself know why la.
Fcuk it.!

Guys dont ever being a nice person. Because it come out to no good ending.

'Girl heard that you fall back. But please for the goddness sake.
Change back ok.? I cant afford to lose anything le . Please.
Take it as i beg you.!'

If you think i'm so free to break you up.? GO ahead.
I dont have to do all this small action. And pls treat ppl in same treatment.
How you treat me in the past i already forget it le.
So just mind your words.!
I trying to do what.? Pls you should know la.
Wenjun is mine main concern . So how a lil good words for you.
End up.? Pls.? I wont be worry even u see this post .
Because is all fact i'm talking bout.
But a good father la. And a good bf la.!!

YESH.!! my dearest is out. I love you T.M.L!!
Hahas.. james say wanna bully you.. faster go beat him up.!

If this what you guys want.? Ok i will jolly well leave.
I know i cant hide away from you guys. As one of this day .
On the way down the road , we will still see each other.
But so what.? I will just jolly well act as if we are a stranger.
Something i rather dont keep it in mind.
The effort i put in may not be alot.
But the words and actions you all DONE to me is enough.
I have suffer more than enough i should.
All being well i have treasure you guys as a gems or whatever shit it is.
But now everything is no longer important. Last msg to all of you guys.
Do take care of yourself. Dont get injury when the time you guys having training.
I will no longer be there to see , to care. Thing have change.
Hope you dont blame me for being heartless. I dont wish.
Lastly , kor sorry if i disappointed you.
This msg will onli know by the ppl i'm refering to.
I treasure the moment we once spend.
Take care.

Perhaps being a fcuker is much more easier
Then SOMEONE who always keep others the first priority.
Because you will be the one end up suffering.
There is one beautiful phrase i saw from one of my friends.
And i love it so much. There it goes.

"Just because her eyes don't tear
doesn't mean her heart doesn't cry.
And just because she comes off strong,
doesn't mean there's nothing wrong."

How you guys think of it.?
I feel it just somehow express how i feel.
It like say doesnt mean i didnt cry mean i'm happy with what i'm now.
Is just that i'm suffering in heart.
Seriously love this phrase.!

'There something i rather hide it in my heart.
Because i'm afraid , afraid to spoil everyone mood just cause of me.
I dont want this to happen.
Is just that sometime sooner or later i will just gone.
Serious , one fine day i will sure went down.
No one can keep it in heart for too long.
I have no one to go to. Should say i rather dont.
But i hope my effort is not wasted.
As in i dont mean thing in return.
Just a simple smile from you. I'm fulfilled.
All i want is just the happiness from you guys.
That all. Asking me losing anything i'm fine with it.
Because your happiness is more worthy than any other thing.'

Went to west coast cc today. It the peeps lion competiton.
Well, not that bad. You did your best.
Let the pic do the talk. I'm lazy to post.



















Oh ya, here is some overdue pic with jas too..=)



' A happy moment will never last long.
I'm so restless and so tired of it. I'm wrong with everything i done.
I dont even know what your mind is thinking.
I cant predict. All i can do is try my best.
But is still in my fault. I understand that you will be angry but i dont wish to.
I dont wish thing to turn bad. But can just understand my i mean.
I'm harmless. But your words harm me lot.
I got simply no comment. I'm totally lost with ur words.
And i shall give up and not knowing anything better.?
I dunno what to do next. '

I'm sorry. I realise my reaction is far too much ytd.
But i have already try my best to control but i just cant make it.
My sincerely apologize once again. My heart really ache.
I cant stand it anyone of you to suffer from all this stuff..
But what can i do. All i can do is pretending nothing happen.
Because you want it to solve thing up by yourself . I understand.
But did you guys know.? It even suffering that knowing it yet nothing i can do.
Same to every single one. I dont want to say it out at first. But i cant stand it.
To everyone in my life . Is really important . No one is left out.
Unless you are just nothing to me.

I dont care who the bloody hell you'r. But please have your own manner.
Mind your own words. Behave like well growth kids.
Than saying those UN-wanted comment to her.
Btw mayb you feel super enjoying after saying that. Then well tell us.
We will just take it as it nv happen b4. giansong kids.!


'Dar dar, Dont be sad or even pissed ok.?
Com we go interview together and there we off to new places ok.?
If you need me just give me a cal..
Because i'm ur dardar too.'

'Congrats, my siaosiao.
Finally it finish. Finally 1 yrs has gone.!
I'm so so so happy for you.
Haas. 3cheer.! Time to ENJOY.!'

' Von. Dont care what they SAY just keep in mind is we sister love you.
You know it right.? Neh.
hehes.. You want to eat duck noodles.
I anytime pei you eat la.. Steady enough.?'

'To all my fren , sis , everyone in my life.
To me. seeing the happiness in your eyes is my greatest wish.
I hate to see the tears. I hate to see the sadness.
All i want is joyness in you. And that my happy thing in life.
Being a human we cant expect much. All we can do is just remain SMILE. '

There my morning gone again.
Doing on ppl blog again.-_-''
But this time round is Tan Weeliat blog.
This idoit ah. Super jialat. Very ma fan want.
Help u dont talk so much. Wait and see ma..
Tired you know. You better thanks me well in ur blog.!
Arbo i will sure kill you. By then you better really find a hole to hide.
Sadded.. Bye my morning time.!

Going ard helping fren to check on it.
But now i'm so afraid it hapen on me.
Now i understand how it feel. I just dono what to do .
Super confuse. Everything has ended i guess so.
I will not hold back anymore. Everything is fate ba.
We just simply can get over this 1 yr. We will have to finish it.
So well do take care. I will take care too.

Haha i spend my morning doing that 2pid ah keng blog.
Go see it hahas.. So pissed when i see his blog is in a mess.!!
I cant stand even now not very neat but at least better than b4.!
I even just edit his first two post . Kns.
Please tidy it ok. My effort ok.!

I think i'm in LOVE with Doris Toh.! Even though i'm talking to her now.
But i'm missing her so badly. Find one day i want to meet her..
Hell. But of cos i'm missing Tan Meiling also. Dont worry la.
I still haven forget you. Hahs.
Omg. My bro is in love with Facebook as well.
Hhahas. Same as siaosiao DORIS TOH.!
He simply spend his whole day on FB ytd.
Even i dont have the chance to use it TILL this MORNING.
Kns. Hahahs.

Lastly, Happy bday Chua Junyong..!

Wow. doris say i never update arh.
Nvm today i update specially for you.=)
Hahas.. Dont blame me la. At bf hse veri mafan . Haha.
Ytd is HIS sister bday. Happy belated SARAH.
Hahas. Busy the whole day doing the BBQ stuff.
Like maid shio. (shake head)
Wake up super early to prepare.
Tat all bah.. Never took much photo. So well.
Mayb next outing with my DEAR DORIS.
Update longer stuff k.? Hhaha.

Guess what i'm shock with it as well.
I have drink more than 6 btl of GREENTEA in less than 4 day.
Is not small btl wan. Is those 1.5L btl drink.
Hell.. Never expect i drink so much.


'Mr ong you are so silly to do that la..
Do takecare k.?'

Enjoy is what a person should need..
This few days i really enjoy myself.
But meanwhile sure there is unappy moment in it.
Now is time to remend for what you have done.


I want to go for Rebornding.
My hair is so suck in this way..
Super KNS~
Cant stand it.. I want nice and beautiful hair.
OMG. Need to spend money again. HELL.~

Some overdue photo took on 03/07 & 06/07


M' myself

M' & Peiting

M' & Sabai BF'

Jieying & M' Sabai BF'

Dont ever make any promise when you dont have the confindent to make it.
Cause once it broken there no fcuking point for you to explain anymore.


If anyone of you know what is happening and feel that i'm not understanding.?
Ok fine. Go ahead. But just to let you guys know.
I'm not this kind of person. As not because i'm demanding so we quarrel.
Is because the promise he broken is far too much.
Which i dont think there a need to bear on anymore.
The reason he came up to cover his mistake.
Is either he is tired or not that he dont want to do. Is he really cant.
There nothing you cant. Since you say you cant.
Why still promise.?

Sickening.

I'm so SICK of the life i'm having now.
SICK and TIRED of it. All i do now is always drink.
What else can i do.? Nothing but still drink.
It seem to be so MEANINGLESS. So restless.
My DEAREST has gone. My HEART has gone.
Everything. I have left with nothing but a empty HEART.
So tell me what else can i do then drinking.?Nothing.
Why must be the one always facing this kind of SICKENING stuff.
I have enough of it. Dont want it anymore.
Is there anyone is kind enough to save me out from the HELL.

寂寞光年

是谁从我天空摘走了星星
一转眼 眉头聚满乌云
从来快乐悲伤都自己横行
忘了我也值得被关心

一双手一个梦
一路上不断的俯冲
痛到忘了要怎么喊痛

漫长的寂寞淹没我的难过
我的世界是零下的沙漠
其实我也想要拥抱的温柔
融化这颗坚强的泡沫

漫长的等候让人特别失落
锋锐寂寞把天空都割破
还有谁能够紧握着我的手
陪着我期待消失的彩虹

是谁将阳光都剪成了雨滴
天灰了 快乐总有限期
从来都陷在孤独的流沙里
忘了我也配被人在意
一个人一直走看着梦像做了又空
精疲力尽有没有哪里可以停泊

漫长的寂寞淹没我的难过
我的世界是零下的沙漠
其实我也想有拥抱的温柔
融化这颗坚强的泡沫

漫长的等候让人特别失落
锋锐寂寞把天空都割破
还有谁能够紧握着我的手
陪着我期待消失的彩虹
那是谁的温柔留在我的小手
微不足道却那么重

漫长的寂寞把意志都吞没
整个世界是沉默的漩涡
有谁能陪我手牵着手出走
带我离开空洞的星球

还有什么值得追求
还有什么可以拥有
把怀抱借给我是不是就不再颤抖
有谁能带走这美丽的哀愁
能让我相信被爱的理由

I will wait for you.!

I LOVE YOU. Thanks for the piglet.


Urs Miss & Mr.

But last and not least. You are a great sister.


The last two msg from her.

'Call you so many times but no answer.
Think you are sleeping ba. Nvm.
Rest ba. U take care of yourself k.
Don worry bout me k and don sad.
I will guai guai de . Wait for me to come out k.
Not need to call or reply to my phone le.
I off it i never bring. Anything can ask cousin to call my dad or bro and ask.
Or ask doris also can k. You take care ba. Miss you.!
Time:12.12'

'I on the way going le. I got bring my phone.
I reach there then i off it pass to my bro le.
Later don send any msg to my phone le.
You take care alright.
Time:01.47'



'Dearest girl,I will wait for you till you come out. I will miss you and wirte letter to you.
I hope you wont forget me. How can we not sad bout it. I just super upset.
I'm going mad. I cant stand it.
Somehow i really feel that i'm so useless. I cant do anything.
Sorry i break a lil promise i made to you.!
I cried. But dont blame me pls. Is because i MISS you.!
Promise not to forget me. Ok.
Also cannot forget doris jieying they all. Ok.
I promise i will wait till you come out ok.! What can i say.?
I dono. I really hope you enjoy urself ytd.
I'm sorry that it not the prefect one but hope you do enjoy urself.
All of us LOVE you.'

NNB!. You r de worst guy i ever since. The most useless guy i ever see.! Dont think ur parent will give in what you want i will do so too.. dont try to force me.! understand fucker.!!

Enough of all your rubbish.! Please you really think that you are so handsome. Like other girl will chase after you.? No la.. Is jus because you are big in size can give secure onli.. In the past young girl all ask for secure not truely love.UNDERSTAND. I dont think will understand because you are always act if you are.! So fine with it.. The most i will first be the want who withdraw out of the 'GAME'.! Dont take thing for granted.!